Cute But Deadly

Autumn the Bunny looks pretty cute, right?

(Please excuse the stains on the floor in the photo below. Our only excuse is that it's the floor underneath NorthernToddler's chair, and we don't have the energy to mop up after him every meal!) In fact, Autumn the Bunny is a killer.

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A few weeks ago, there was a long spell of really cold weather in NorthernLand. Zero and below. NorthernDaddy took pity on Autumn and moved her cage into the kitchen. (Mostly a selfish move: NorthernDaddy was tired of the waterer freezing up every twenty minutes.) Everyone enjoyed her company and having her in the kitchen.....until the latest bag of hay was opened. NorthernDaddy has a moderate grass allergy, and this bag of hay was super-effective at triggering that allergy. NorthernMommy and Toddler tried to help by volunteering to be the ones to feed the hay, but the allergies persisted. The bag of hay was tossed out the door, all carpets and air ducts were vacuumed, and the furnace filter was replaced - no affect on the allergies.

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NorthernDaddy is was sympathetic to the bunny; she's not really trying to kill NorthernDaddy....it's just the grass, and she needs to be inside in the warm.

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A few days later, the bunny is still inside and still getting hay. She's also shedding a very fine coat of hair - her cage is starting to look like a rabbit fur "poof". No problem, NorthernDaddy is taking an allergy medication to allieviate his symptoms.

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At three A.M. on Sunday morning, NorthernDaddy woke up not able to breathe. His nose was clogged and his throat was constricted - to the point of wanting to head for the Emergency Room. (Seriously. NorthernDaddy was even considering how to perform a self-tracheotomy if the rescue squad couldn't make it in time!) After calming down and getting some cool water and breathing some cold air, NorthernDaddy's condition improved - but he was convinced that the bunny was indeed trying to kill him.

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NorthernMommy and Toddler went to Boston to see Funny Cartoon Movie Characters On Frozen Water (we're not about breaking trademark law on this blog - try using the rhyme "kidneys on rice", it sounds close enough!). NorthernDaddy saw this as an opportunity to move Autumn the Bunny back out to the mudroom (and save his life!). With NorthernToddler out of the house for a day or two, NorthernDaddy wouldn't have to listen to the endless stream of questions from Toddler inquiring as to why the bunny had to move. Two minutes after the NorthernToddlerAdventureMobile™ pulled out of the drive, the bunny's cage was relocated to the mudroom. NorthernDaddy thwarts another attempt to kill him! (NorthernMommy counts for attempts #3 through 8!)

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Yup, Autumn the Bunny is a killer....but we'll keep her around anyway....